Let that sink in. After you’ve made it through several rounds of interviews (half of them evaluating your resume, the other half evaluating your cultural fit), they offer $2,000 to give you one last chance to jump ship. They’ll even pay the full salary of the five week training period if you quit before it ends.

The people who work at Zappos WANT to be there. The Zappos you see is the genuine Zappos.

Tony Hsieh, founder and CEO of Zappos, is more comfortable talking “culture” than “social media” (he doesn’t even like the term “social media”). In the online marketing world, we love Zappos because it’s a social media darling – one of a handful of firms to run a blockbuster social campaign. We look at them for clues on how to run our own successful campaigns. In fact, that’s the primary reason I attended the DMNews Marketer of the Month interview with Tony this past Monday.

But Tony wasn’t there to share his social media marketing wisdom. He didn’t specifically point to the answer and say, “This is why Zappos is able Tweet effectively…” but he gave us a big clue.

The clue is culture.

Tony’s top three priorities for the company are:
1. Culture
2. Customer Service
3. Clothing

The product, or “what it does,” is third on the list. Can you say that about your company? Should everyone be able to say that about their companies? Is it a good business model? Is it a better business model?
It’s a model that works well for social marketing.

I feel like it’s becoming cliché to say it, but social media isn’t what you do, it’s who you are. Your company is a profile in the online world. Nobody wants to be friends with a company. Nobody wants to be a fan of a company. People gravitate to personality. They want to associate themselves with people and things on the internet that reflect their own values.

You can have that kind of relationship with Zappos. The clue is culture. That might not be the explanation for every successful social media campaign, but it sure works for Zappos.

What has been the reaction? People love it. They eat it up. Zappos.com has some of the most avid corporate groupies in the social media space. So I paid close attention when Tony Hsieh, founder and CEO of Zappos, was recently asked the question, “Other than Twitter, what are you currently doing from a social media perspective?”

His answer sounded disappointed, almost offended. “I don’t like the term ‘social media.’” To Tony, his company’s Twitter account is a reflection of the company culture. He never had to force it. He didn’t consider the ROI and pronounce the program “worthy of investment.” It was just something that made sense. Zappos was the type of company that had a Twitter-type relationship with its customers.

This point received further clarification in his response to the follow up question about company guidelines and policies around Twitter.

“Be real. Use your best judgment.”

Tony doesn’t try to mandate some form of corporate PR quality control, he just lets the employees be themselves. He hires the right people for his company and he lets them be themselves.

How novel.

And how frightening.

But if we’re going to keep moving forward as marketers in the present age, we’re going to have to learn to be comfortable around novel things. And we’re going to have to get used to being frightened.

At least we can take solace in the fact that our most valuable social tool (and Tony agrees with this 100%) is still the good, old-fashioned telephone.

All I have to say, is … it was worth it.

FaceTime is pretty amazing, yes you have to be on an active WiFi connection, but do it once and suddenly you don’t mind restrictions. I keep hearing complaints regarding service interruption based on the way you hold the phone (which to me is sort of like saying “it hurts when I do this”… Well? DON’T DO THAT!). Sheesh people. Steve Jobs is smart and controls many things, but he cannot control the way you hold your phone, caveman.

The clear screen is a huge improvement over the previous models. It reminds me of the day I first saw HD TV. Some of you kids don’t remember analog sets, but what an improvement it was. There are many cool features, but I’ve yet to discover them all. You know, I have to make up for the work time I missed while standing in line in the Texas heat with a bunch of high school kids who were out for the summer.

Thanks to all the friends who brought Doritos and sat with us and kept us company.

It was a great experience.

Now, if I could only figure out how to turn this thing on …

1. “Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.” – Monitor your competition. What are they doing? Capitalize on their mistakes, and learn from their successes and failures. Find out how they position themselves. Can you meet their service levels or even offer something better?

2. “Round up the usual suspects.” – While odd problems do crop up, check the typical offenders, first. A decline in organic traffic? Ensure your content is fresh and visible to search engines. No activity through your PPC campaigns? Check your budget caps. Analytics package showing strange results? Make sure everything is tagged properly.

3. “My momma always said, life was like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.” – Just because our audience behaved a certain way last month doesn’t mean they’re still doing the same thing today. From creative tests, to landing page tests, to conversion optimization, as effective performance marketers, we must evolve. Compare the performance of “Sale on Widgets” to “Widgets on Sale.” Don’t assume you know the answer. Test, test, and test some more. Along those lines …

4. “You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.” – Being able to draw accurate and actionable conclusions takes time. If you’re trying a landing page conversion test, don’t assume that Page A is better based on one day (or week, or month) of data. Be sure you have statistically relevant results before making sweeping decisions.

5. “You’re gonna need a bigger boat.” – or a bigger budget, or a better tool. Time and again, I’ve seen companies invest in a solution, program, or product, and stubbornly refuse to switch courses even in the face of compelling reasons to adjust their initial plans.

6. “You can’t handle the truth.” – As you test, be prepared to get surprised. Who knew that ad copy with text speak (like ‘LOL’ or ‘OMG’) could convert? Texting-happy teenagers!

7. “I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse.” – Use demographics of existing customers to find new ones in creative places. Does a 43-year old woman fall within your target market? Perhaps you should consider advertising within or alongside a social game, specifically tailoring your creative message to speak to her. Even better, can you include an incentive to purchase, such as a FarmVille or Mafia Wars gift card?

8. “Elementary, my dear Watson.” – Progress is crucial; however, we must also keep a keen eye on the basic principles of marketing. Who is our customer? There may be a spiffy new pilot program but does it reach our target audience? What does our customer want? If they’re shopping for widgets but all of our materials try to drive them to sprockets, prospective shoppers are going to take their dollars elsewhere.

9. “What we’ve got here is a failure to communicate.” – Communication is vital in any relationship, including the one we have with our customers. From a consistent branding message, to clearly delineating our latest offering, we must communicate. When an ad says “Free Shipping” but in reality it’s free shipping only at a certain price point, consumers are justifiably disgruntled.

10. “I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.” – There are so many great resources out there; bloggers sharing their experiences with testing in PPC campaigns, emerging social marketing techniques, and how algorithm changes impact search engine optimization. It impresses me, because they’re putting information out there for all of us to use – even competitors!

Did you recognize all the movie quotes? Bonus points if you did! Now I’m curious — Did your favorite movie teach you anything about search engine marketing? I’m off to see if I can structure a test to prove the worth of showing a movie every afternoon in the conference room. Don’t worry; “I’ll be back.“

So, it was with interest that I read this article by AP writer Martha Irvine about the youngest up-and-coming generation. Referred to as Generation Z or the “Homelanders” by various researchers, this is a group of kids who fully understand the technology we are only beginning to embrace, are free thinking by nature, and are taking Gen Y’s traits to a whole new level of multi-tasking and acceptance. These kids were raised with an African American president in office, are hearing their parents discuss environmental issues and watching them recycle (at least at our house) and would never… Not ever… Watch a commercial during Dora. (That’s what DVRs are for, and they know no different.)

Now, I’ll need to update this post at some point, because, I’m sorry but “Generation Z” or “The Homelanders” just do not do it for me. We are talking about the most highly technology-evolved generation in history and a group that has full expectations of having their “15 minutes of fame.” There has to be a more compelling moniker, and I’m on a mission to find it.

Here is a sampling of the results:

Sprint Navigation for the BlackBerry Pearl 8130

I was desperate, so I decided to scroll through the results. Not one of the results on the page is for Sprint’s standard GPS navigation software, but it got me thinking of some of the ways that good search experiences have completely spoiled me:

• I constantly look for search kiosks in grocery stores.
• I get mad when I do a local search and it doesn’t bring up a OneBox result.
• I refuse to click next page if I don’t find what I want.
• I only type in a few letters to most search boxes and anxiously wait for suggestions.
• The first thing I look for on a complex page is a search box.
• I suffer anxiety at the thought of having to browse through a directory.
• I have become very, very bad at finding anything in the Yellow Pages.

I’m a little extreme, but I’m also part of a very valuable segment online for all kinds of businesses. There are a lot of us, and there is a lot of bad search. As a retailer, I’d want to know exactly how that segment felt about the experience I was providing, and optimize it as effectively as I could.

How much money do you think Sprint loses to bad search?

(I know, I know. Buy an iPhone. On it.)

What do you do?

Most people would say go with what’s been working, and keep the ball in the air as there’s a better chance of doing more with just a little time. Keep feeding it to the rookie, and make sure he gets out of bounds if he doesn’t make it to the end zone.

They would be wrong in this situation.

Some of the gutsier people would say that you’ve got the defense on their heels – fake a pass and have your running back shoot outside to either the endzone or the sideline.

They would be wrong, too.

In fact, even with all the complexities of the game and all the possibilities, there’s only one right answer to this dilemma…and that’s to take a knee and end the game.

You see, even with all the other information that you got about the situation the most critical piece was missing: That you’re up 20-10. That long pass was just meant to get you the last first down you needed to end the game.

Knowing the right measures to keep an eye on is vastly more important than having a huge number of facts at your fingertips, whether it’s in football, online marketing efforts or life. Sure, a lot of the details can really spice up the game / presentation / water cooler talk, and can be great for strategies the next game / campaign / trip to the grocery store, but never lose sight of the bottom line. Find the metrics that need to be accomplished, weigh what remains to be done with time and resources, and only then determine your next move.

I personally have been forced to spend quite a bit more time within this particular analytics tool and to be honest, most of the time I narrowly focus on the bare essentials I need to complete the task. I realize, however, that there is a hidden treasure trove of data for me to uncover. I just can’t seem to find my way through the labyrinth of choices and meanings and links to helpful tips. Never mind that when I finally do get to the meaning of one particular report, when I try and replicate it for another client the meanings and associations might be completely different. I understand that personalization and customization is essential to businesses. But what is an agency to do when there’s no place to turn for help?

Years ago, when I first started managing accounts, I would try to think like a client in order to traverse a particularly twisted and question-riddled road. More often than not, though, the person responsible for the system setup was unavailable or even unsure themselves of how the underlying structure had been built. Or even better, the setup had been put in place 3 years ago and no one can remember where that guy went, but he’s long gone. Being forced into proactivity, I would reach out to the respective Analytics Company’s reps for help.

I’m not pointing fingers, but let’s just say that if my friendly neighborhood analytics provider was a 1-800 suicide prevention hotline, I’d be a long-gone and mourned-for angst-y teen with too much eyeliner.

It’s tantamount to just learning to read and being locked outside the library door. I want to read and be better at it, but I need someone to help me get in first. Maybe even walk me over to the card catalogue. After I have a few proverbial books under my belt, I’ll probably settle in for a nice long stretch. Maybe dig into Beverly Cleary’s oeuvre and then move on to the unpleasant surprises of Judy Blume. Eventually, though, I’ll have to get to the proverbial Dostoevsky, at which point I’ll need some help from an Analytics “professor.” Hopefully there’s one around who has actually read the relevant book.

So, what’s the point of my rant? My clients are paying top dollar for mounds of data, and that data might as well be John Nash’s mad scribbling on the wall. And, as a customer service focused agency, I just have to ask the Omnitures of the world – What’s the point of all this data if there is no filtering, no context and… well… no human being to walk a marketer through it?

So, I ask – for the rest of the mediocre terminals out there… Let’s step it up a notch shall we? How about incorporating things like free power, I pay $7.00 for water – you can offer me a power outlet, or incorporating a dependable wireless network, one that might allow you to download a song in less than 1 hour.

Most of all, what would you say to a little bathroom update? Granted, 10 years ago people were less likely to have so much baggage. Now, we’re trying to fit everything we own into one small carry on and one personal item – neither of which fit in the bathroom stall. About the time I’m trying to figure out the geometric equation that will allow me and my items into the stall, I hear the man on the loudspeaker reminding me not to leave my items unattended. Thanks for that, Mr. Airport Man! You’re very helpful.

So in the spirit of changing times, when everyone and everything is different than it was 10 years ago – why do some of us still expect the old ways to work? Innovation is about more than an added feature; it’s about making what you have the absolute best it can be.

Our shoppers are evolved. They are all unique and they are sophisticated and they are very, very demanding. Driving someone to a unique landing page focused on his or her query is nice, but beyond that what do you do? Focus on the checkout. The real opportunity is to keep the conversion moving forward. Let your customer feel like they’ve accomplished something when they hit submit; don’t just serve up another form to fill out. Most importantly, listen to your customers. Drop off points and abandoned carts are big magnifying glasses into the mind of your customer. Sure, we used to speak of “abandonment” fairly often, but in a tough economy that conversation is a lot more relevant. If you’re spending money on marketing, make that marketing the best it can be. Your site is the real opportunity to gain market share, the only place where you as a marketer have complete control.

Traffic from an organic search behaves differently than traffic from display media. Embrace that notion, allow your customers to be unique. And please, stop trying to shove everything into a single stall, it’s just not going to fit no matter how you try.